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Partner mediation — Mediator
Partners may be seeking a decision about shared responsibilities rather than treatment for relationship distress. State the practical topic and preferred type of help; the mediator should check privately whether mediation, counselling, independent advice or a different support route fits the situation.
Service scope
Facilitation of practical disagreements between partners where they want help reaching decisions or improving how a particular issue is discussed. This catalogue service is treated as mediation, not relationship counselling, and any overlap with separation or family mediation needs clarification.
What is normally included
- Clarification of a shared practical disagreement
- Neutral discussion between partners
- Agreed communication or decision-making arrangements
What is not included
- Couples psychotherapy
- Deciding fault in a relationship
- Treating coercion or abuse as an ordinary negotiation
Typical tasks
- Clarify the kind of help requested
- Assess each partner's willingness privately
- Define a manageable discussion agenda
- Facilitate exploration of practical options
- Record any mutually agreed next steps
What to include in your brief
- Practical issue to discuss
- Whether both partners wish to participate
- Current separation or family process
- Preferred meeting format
- Language and access needs
Choosing the right professional
Confirm that the provider is offering neutral mediation and not presenting it as couples therapy. Ask how they assess safety, manage separate contacts and recognise when the issues require a clinician or independent legal advisers instead.
Important considerations
- Mediation and relationship therapy have different purposes
- Consent may not be freely given in every relationship
- Shared financial or parenting decisions may need separate advice
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